If I had a million dollars

I've never been a wealthy person. I was born with no silver spoon in my mouth.. in fact, as a child, I remember using picnic-ware at most meals.. recycled too! Mom taught us where to load it in the dishwasher so it wouldn't melt. I remember living in our apartment which was attached to a mortuary; at the time there were four kids. We all shared a bedroom the size of a walk-in closet. There was a bunkbed for the two oldest kids (I had the top until I started falling off in my sleep), a trundel bed kept under the bunkbed for the middle sister, and baby Johnny was in the crib... until he was three or four and his legs started sticking out of the bars.

But we were happy! Beside the fact that there were corpses in the basement and hurses in the parking lot, it was a very normal childhood. We did have a limosine! It was usually strictly used for funeral processions, but we had to take it on a road trip once because the family had grown out of the Oldsmobile Omega. I remember stopping at a McDonald's on this trip, and seeing all the curious eyes wondering what celebrity might be craving a Big Mac.. then they saw us, The Fausetts, piling out in ragedy-road-trip-stained sweats, messy hair, and candy residue on our faces. We were a picture of class! I'm sure weeks later, mourning families with sad heads hanging down as they were transported to the cemetary, were wondering why there were french fries stuck to the limo carpet.

Now I'm broke and married and a mom. My little boy knows the joy of wearing 4th hand clothes, and staying in a diaper until every last bit of absorbtion is used up. But this situation makes us better people in the long run. For instance; I would never look at an orphan and think "Wow, what a dirty, pitiful little kid!" Instead, I would think to myself "I wonder where he got those great shoes."

SO.. If I ever had a million dollars (or 500,000 after taxes), I think I would probably use more diapers.